Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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