Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
