Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
