Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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