Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
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