Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
