oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
