I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
