so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
