guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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