Your dad touched me again.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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