It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
