Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
