This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
