he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
