I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
