Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize