I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
PANTIES FOUND
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