I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Randomize
