Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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