Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize