he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
