Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
