The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
