It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I forgot wine drunk hurts
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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