I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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