ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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