You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
