Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
