oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize