butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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