when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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