So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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