Don't you send me to vm
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Randomize
