Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
