what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
