Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
