Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
