Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Send help, water and tortillas.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
