I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I am one with the molecules
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Randomize
