Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
