Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Alive.
So much puke
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
