FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
