This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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