we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
