I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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