So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
