So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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