He is such a slut. More and more my type.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
