I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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