Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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